http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-Cw8I8eukaI
If I choose to serve Him this day, things WILL be better the next. This is so true. If you serve God you feel His love for you. This gives you identity as a His child which gives the strength and desire to move forward in righteousness.
Last week was a struggle. Saturday night I had a long conversation with my friend Paul. I don't know if it was anything he said or what but I felt SO much better after talking to him. I felt sort of selfish because we talked about me so much and my issues but I need to be humble and accept the help the Lord sends me. He works through my fellow brothers and sisters here on Earth. I have a strong testimony of this and I am so grateful for Paul's help.
I found myself in a negative cycle last week involving a loss of hope for those that I care about around me, negative thoughts about myself and some of my ED. It was started on Tuesday and got pretty bad on Thursday to horrible on Saturday. But it stopped there. Sunday was WAY better. Monday was amazing. And today, Tuesday was great. I love the gospel. I love how much I learn because I have the guidance of the Spirit. I have the word of God. I am able to speak with God. I have great friends and family. Life is truly wonderful!
I am proud of myself for not staying in my little rut for very long. The week before had been AMAZING. One of the best weeks mentally that I have ever had since I was a child. So Satan was probably not happy with that. That is okay though. I probably needed some humbling from God anyway. I know it has made me stronger. I must pray in Thanks for the trial and to more fully understand its importance in my spiritual growth and how to apply what I learned from it into my life.
Something I am grateful for- the gift of compassion. It is one that God has blessed me with and helped me develop. I have definitely not always been one to love everyone. I feel compassion and love for people that have recently become a part of my daily life that before I would have most likely despised. God has blessed me with the ability to see them as His children, my fellow brother and sister. I only desire happiness for them. I feel sorry for them- the way they value family and treat their children. I feel sorry that the gospel is not a part of their life. It is not possible for me to share the gift of the gospel with them because of work regulations but they know I am LDS so I will do my best to share it with them through my actions. I can also share my testimony through my thoughts. I should work on this more. I honestly look at these people with an aching love in my heart, that is the only way I know how to describe it. They just don't know. But I am grateful for this gift of compassion and love I have obtained from the God through the direction of the Holy Ghost.
